I’m thinking of running for president. That’s right, I’m pretty qualified. I started thinking about this……last night and decided I should run. I started thinking about how our president is running our country and then I wondered how does he think these huge “CHANGES” are going to work out….and that is when I started thinking about “work”.
I have been working at a job pretty much since I was 15 and had to put gas in my own motorcycle. It was a gas guzzler with only 70 mpg and gas was a whopping 17 cents per gallon. I made .65 cents/hour at the car wash working for Mr. Lunsford. I recall he had a cute daughter and a ski boat, I may have to factor that into the background vetting process. I wonder if that is considered an unclaimed benefit.
Since then I’ve had lots of jobs. I’ve had so many I could lend a couple to the politicians that have never actually had a real job. So I made a list of my jobs and their relevance:
1) Car Wash Attendant ---------Water Conservation & Environmental Impact
2) City Road Maintenance( potholes) -------- Highway Development (Shovel Ready Projects)
3) Grave Stone Setting --------- Final Arrangement Service (Death Counseling)
4) Grocery Store Stocker ----------- Food Delivery Management (FEMA)
5) Gas Station ---------- Petroleum Distribution (Alternative Energy)
6) Ranch Hand -----------Agriculture and Cattle Management
7) Mechanic --------- Automotive Emission Standards (EPA)
8) Nursing Home Orderly ---------- Senior Health Care Specialist
9) Hospital Orderly ---------- Medical Services (HIPPA)
10) Muffler Shop ----------- Environmental Noise Expert (EPA)
11) Carpet Installer -------- Adhesive and Textiles
12) General Construction Laborer --------- Commercial Contractor
13) House Painter -------- Home Improvement and Restoration
14) Furniture Mover ------- Family Relocation Services
15) Janitor ----------- Sanitation Engineer
16) Security Guard --------- Protection Services Expert
17) Tire Installer --------- Automotive Tire Inflation Specialist (good gas mileage)
18) Insurance Sales ------------ Evil Insurance Company Employee
19) Stock Broker (NASD) -------------- Greedy Investment Advisor
20) Goodyear Tire Store Manager ----------- White Collar Manager
21) Ford Service Writer --------- Corporate Automotive Executive (good)
22) GM Service Writer --------- Corporate Automotive Executive (bad)
23) Unemployed --------- Out Of Work American Without Adequate Benefits
24) Deputy Sheriff ---------- Legal and Law Professional
a) Police Patrol -------- Criminal Investigation and Response
b) DARE Officer -------- Drug Abuse Prevention Expert
c) School Officer -------- Teen Guidance Counselor
d) Speakers Bureau Citizens Groups --------- Community Organizer !!!
e) Traffic Enforcement --------- Transportation Engineer
f) Firearms Instructor ---------- Gun Control Expert (firm grip and sight alignment)
25) Motorcycle Dealership ----------- Small Business Owner (Entrepreneur /Employer)
Now that I have shown you my work related credentials and I’m sure you will agree that I have far more experience than necessary but there’s more. I was born into a military family. My father was in the army and when he got out he went to college and worked to support his wife and child at the same time earning a teaching certificate and a seminary degree. He became a minister and teacher in a poor Western town in rural Colorado till he accepted a position as a missionary in Kenya (see a connection yet).
I went to grade school in a one room school house carpooling for many miles over rough roads always aware of the people who were barefoot and walking because they lacked the resources to obtain a car of their own. I later attended the missionary boarding school where I learned the hardship of being sent away from your family and home. When I made it to high school I transferred to a British school for boys which had strict discipline and no nonsense first class teachers that held students accountable for their grades with no concern for our self esteem or feelings in either head or buttocks.
My peers were other boys from England, China, India, Pakistan, East Germany, Denmark and Yugoslavia. They were Buddhist, Hindu, Sikhs, Muslims and even Communists. I got along with all of them because we were just boys and all subject to the whims of the Prefects who strove to teach us the lessons of life that someone higher up is always there to make you miserable. Knee socks are not the only thing that goes downhill.
I learned that the American Flag provides great comfort and protection and it also can bring great animosity and derision. I learned to cherish its significance and the “Big Stick” it symbolized. Above all others, America stood for truth and justice when others faltered and most knew that.
I returned to America at the end of the fabulous ‘60s in time to learn how to drive in those wonderful gas guzzling cars, start dating and graduate high school. By my count I’ve owned 1 motor home and 2 boats and 30+ motorcycles and 30 cars (my Olds 98 was 3” longer than a 12 passenger van). I should be a Car Czar. I’ve even had 3 Toyotas.
I attended a Christian Liberal Arts College and was fashionably rebellious, liberal and full of youthful idealism. I studied to be a teacher and majored in history and social studies. After graduation, I married and moved to Southern California where I became absorbed in the human struggle to pay rent and eat. Around this time I surrounded myself with intellectual pro military conservatives (retired Navy) that began to teach me the principals of capitalism, and that if you work hard, doors of opportunity open freely.
My education continued with each new career move and by the time I entered law enforcement I was a parent with two children and I became versed in the needs of working parents for child daycare and the hardship of shift work on family life. I have a full appreciation for the cost of college tuition and for the struggle to provide adequately for retirement.
I’ve lived across the world in an underdeveloped country. I’ve traveled to many other countries that are both developed and not. I have also been all across America and seen the amazing contrasts in the way we live and the way we are free to move about and to take advantage of the opportunities we are given if we simply want to. My family came to America in the early 1700s. I know some fought in the Revolutionary War. I wonder what they thought of the achievement of the Founding Fathers and the Republic they gave us. When I took my oath of office, it was to uphold the Constitution of The United States. It was never rescinded.
I could have written a book. Lots of people do and I have read their books and used some of their material in my work. I never really felt that anyone would need to read my book since there already so many qualified writers doing the job. After all what could I add? What would make me an authority or expert on any of the subjects I’ve listed here that has not already been covered by others? You see that is exactly the question I ask about being in elected office let alone the highest office of president. What makes one qualified to be president? I’ve always believed that it should be more. He should have the best leadership qualities and should have real world experience in the areas of business and finance and trade and should also be versed in foreign affairs. I expect someone a lot more experienced than me. It should require more than a Harvard law degree and being a Community Organizer. Being groomed for the job by someone else that won’t or can’t get the job themselves worries me. It worries me that this president wants to “Fundamentally Change” America rather than protect it from those that would try to change it.
Barak Obama has demonstrated that anyone can succeed in America and become The President. That is at the same time wonderful and very very frightening. You see, I will not run for President. I do not believe I have the qualifications but I do believe that my resume, with the right shiny wrapping and clever wording and enough political money behind it would look pretty good ……….. and I would uphold the oath I took that day I put on the badge.
Did I mention my 5th cousin is Abe Lincoln?
Tim Woodsome
Runnin With Scissors
Tuesday, March 16, 2010
Monday, March 1, 2010
My Doctor's Not A Cave Man
I'm Healthy! Old, but healthy. At least that is what I found out today from two doctors. Two very different doctors, neither of whom I would consider going to if I felt sick or was even remotely concerned about my health.
There is a new commercial on TV lately that shows a cave-man being checked out by another cave-man and then a sick guy being checked out by a witchdoctor then a guy from the middle ages and so on up to the modern era where the Lady doctor checks out a kid with a hand held device similar to the one Dr. McCoy had on Star Trek. Yeah, we're there. We just can't make instant cures yet but we're closer. The point of the commercial is to promote the new technology and says all through time there have been people that are ill and someone who says, "let me have a look."
Presently our nation is deeply divided over the issue of Health Care. We hear phrases like "1/6 of the US economy" or "30 million uninsured" or "every one has a right to equal health care" . We keep hearing that we need a "government option" and "government take over" and a "Canadian style single payer system". We also hear $$$$$$$$$$$$ billions of dollars and trillions of dollars and that the system is broke and we don't have the money to pay for it.
OK, HERE IS THE TRUTH IN A NUTSHEL. We have arguably the finest system in the history of the world. We used to joke about about the stuff of Star Trek but today I experienced some of that marvelous technology. You see I went to the Dentist and the Optometrist. My dental hygienist told me I was healthy based on the condition of my gums and mouth. I sat in the chair and watched as she cleaned my teeth, and checked every tooth against a computer screen that shows all my teeth, MY TEETH, taken from a picture taken by a very cool sort of X-ray machine and right there at her finger tips, clear and detailed. No more of those old negatives on a white screen. I have to say I don't mind going to the dentist. I'm old enough to remember the days when it was like the Little Shop of Horrors. I actually got a tooth removed when I was 19 and the dentist put his knee on my chest and used a mallet to knock the molar out. I have not felt a lick of pain at the dentist's office in the last 30 years. That fantastic !
Right after that, I rode (yes rode the motorcycle, they run so well when it is cold) to the eye guy. I was sitting in a chair surrounded by miracle machines that looked at my eyes and told the people there everything they needed to know to keep my sight at it's optimum. The doc there told me he could tell my blood pressure was great and my blood sugar is ok and I look to be in good health. My sight is fine for my age and my prescription has not changed very much in the last year. (My glasses lenses are quite scratched though, like looking through a shower door.)
While I was there in both of those fine offices I was aware of the wonderful advances we have made in our society in so few years in medical care. I try to eat well, watch my sugar and exercise at least a little. I quit smoking 23 years ago when my son was born and I watch my alcohol and unless I get whacked when I'm riding by a "texting while driving" nit wit, I stand a good chance of living long enough to be very unhappy in a bankrupt America.
Nothing is FREE. There is no free health care. I asked the eye doctor about the machines in his office as he looked at a picture of my eye showing all the details of the blood vessels and cornea, if this was all a result of our private health care and would the Obama health care plan help or hurt. He told me that yes the investment in their equipment is expensive, very. And they will not be able to do that in the future and still take on the same level of Medicare and Medicaid patients as the government cuts the payments to the doctors for those services. 20 % to 40 % cuts in payments, when they serve patient levels as high as 60% Medicare means they can not be profitable enough to make the necessary investment to keep on the cutting edge of technology. I want that latest greatest machine that makes doctors better able to do their job.
I don't want a witch doctor or some snake oil selling traveling medicine show to be my future choice. Hell, I quit Kaiser Health back in the '90s because I never got to see the same doctor twice in a row. I'll put up with the waiting to see a good one.
When I was 18, I was an orderly in a hospital. I saw some bizarre things. I once held a mental patient down while staff strapped her to a table and administered electro shock therapy (shocking experience). I saw aides sharpen scalpels and needles and other stuff we wouldn't think of doing today. We have great health care in this country. It may need some tweaking but it does not need to be destroyed like a tumor in order to save the patient.
People need to realize that free is very expensive. Insurance is a gamble and actuarial tables exist in order to calculate risk. If you live in a straw house you pay more for wolf insurance than the guy in the brick house. (aren't fables amazing how they relate to life?) If you don't pay for your share, why should I? Or better yet why should I care? There are always means to provide for the "Widdas N Orphans" in our society. I've no objection to that but when I see a guy smoking cigarettes and fat as Humpty Dumpty eatin at the buffet when I'm looking at sugar content on a bag of puffed rice, then I'm a little insensitive to his insurance needs.
So I am healthy and plan on staying that way but our America is not. She is nearly broke and this health bill is likely to be the bad medicine that will kill her. Call your politicians and tell them to scrap this nonsense or you will be seeing to it that they will not only be unemployed but standing in line with you to see the witch doctor next time they have a belly ache.
Tim Woodsome
Running with (the Nurse's) Scissors
There is a new commercial on TV lately that shows a cave-man being checked out by another cave-man and then a sick guy being checked out by a witchdoctor then a guy from the middle ages and so on up to the modern era where the Lady doctor checks out a kid with a hand held device similar to the one Dr. McCoy had on Star Trek. Yeah, we're there. We just can't make instant cures yet but we're closer. The point of the commercial is to promote the new technology and says all through time there have been people that are ill and someone who says, "let me have a look."
Presently our nation is deeply divided over the issue of Health Care. We hear phrases like "1/6 of the US economy" or "30 million uninsured" or "every one has a right to equal health care" . We keep hearing that we need a "government option" and "government take over" and a "Canadian style single payer system". We also hear $$$$$$$$$$$$ billions of dollars and trillions of dollars and that the system is broke and we don't have the money to pay for it.
OK, HERE IS THE TRUTH IN A NUTSHEL. We have arguably the finest system in the history of the world. We used to joke about about the stuff of Star Trek but today I experienced some of that marvelous technology. You see I went to the Dentist and the Optometrist. My dental hygienist told me I was healthy based on the condition of my gums and mouth. I sat in the chair and watched as she cleaned my teeth, and checked every tooth against a computer screen that shows all my teeth, MY TEETH, taken from a picture taken by a very cool sort of X-ray machine and right there at her finger tips, clear and detailed. No more of those old negatives on a white screen. I have to say I don't mind going to the dentist. I'm old enough to remember the days when it was like the Little Shop of Horrors. I actually got a tooth removed when I was 19 and the dentist put his knee on my chest and used a mallet to knock the molar out. I have not felt a lick of pain at the dentist's office in the last 30 years. That fantastic !
Right after that, I rode (yes rode the motorcycle, they run so well when it is cold) to the eye guy. I was sitting in a chair surrounded by miracle machines that looked at my eyes and told the people there everything they needed to know to keep my sight at it's optimum. The doc there told me he could tell my blood pressure was great and my blood sugar is ok and I look to be in good health. My sight is fine for my age and my prescription has not changed very much in the last year. (My glasses lenses are quite scratched though, like looking through a shower door.)
While I was there in both of those fine offices I was aware of the wonderful advances we have made in our society in so few years in medical care. I try to eat well, watch my sugar and exercise at least a little. I quit smoking 23 years ago when my son was born and I watch my alcohol and unless I get whacked when I'm riding by a "texting while driving" nit wit, I stand a good chance of living long enough to be very unhappy in a bankrupt America.
Nothing is FREE. There is no free health care. I asked the eye doctor about the machines in his office as he looked at a picture of my eye showing all the details of the blood vessels and cornea, if this was all a result of our private health care and would the Obama health care plan help or hurt. He told me that yes the investment in their equipment is expensive, very. And they will not be able to do that in the future and still take on the same level of Medicare and Medicaid patients as the government cuts the payments to the doctors for those services. 20 % to 40 % cuts in payments, when they serve patient levels as high as 60% Medicare means they can not be profitable enough to make the necessary investment to keep on the cutting edge of technology. I want that latest greatest machine that makes doctors better able to do their job.
I don't want a witch doctor or some snake oil selling traveling medicine show to be my future choice. Hell, I quit Kaiser Health back in the '90s because I never got to see the same doctor twice in a row. I'll put up with the waiting to see a good one.
When I was 18, I was an orderly in a hospital. I saw some bizarre things. I once held a mental patient down while staff strapped her to a table and administered electro shock therapy (shocking experience). I saw aides sharpen scalpels and needles and other stuff we wouldn't think of doing today. We have great health care in this country. It may need some tweaking but it does not need to be destroyed like a tumor in order to save the patient.
People need to realize that free is very expensive. Insurance is a gamble and actuarial tables exist in order to calculate risk. If you live in a straw house you pay more for wolf insurance than the guy in the brick house. (aren't fables amazing how they relate to life?) If you don't pay for your share, why should I? Or better yet why should I care? There are always means to provide for the "Widdas N Orphans" in our society. I've no objection to that but when I see a guy smoking cigarettes and fat as Humpty Dumpty eatin at the buffet when I'm looking at sugar content on a bag of puffed rice, then I'm a little insensitive to his insurance needs.
So I am healthy and plan on staying that way but our America is not. She is nearly broke and this health bill is likely to be the bad medicine that will kill her. Call your politicians and tell them to scrap this nonsense or you will be seeing to it that they will not only be unemployed but standing in line with you to see the witch doctor next time they have a belly ache.
Tim Woodsome
Running with (the Nurse's) Scissors
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